When I first became a mom, I remember how overwhelmed I felt, how defeated I felt and how drained I felt. Here are some words I wish I heard when I was feeling this way.
1.) Sleep when they sleep.
This was a hard one for me. Yes, I was exhausted and sleep deprived, but I rarely ever slept when my daughter did because it was almost impossible to get anything around the house done when she was awake. So, I stayed awake to tires myself out more by cleaning the house. Another reason I didn’t sleep when she did, is because of new parent paranoia. I was too afraid that I wouldn’t hear her wake up if I went to sleep. Eventually, I learned that I need sleep too and not to worry so much about housework all the time. It’s more important to be rested to be able to take care of all your baby’s needs. Besides, when I finally did sleep, I didn’t ever fall into a deep sleep. I basically slept with one eye open.
2.) Plan ahead (or try to ).
I’m telling you, planning ahead of time will make your life easier. Plan the day in advance; food, activities, naptimes… Everything if you can. ( A mom’s life is crazy and be unpredictable.) Planning ahead even if it doesn’t always work out will give you peace of mind and when it does work out, your day will run smoother.
3.) Ask for help.
This was also a hard one for me. I rarely ever asked for help with anything. I remember a specific night in particular… Averie, a few weeks old and around that time, she was awake and hungry ever 2 hours. So, needless to say, I was extremely sleep deprived. This night, Averie was extra fussy and it seemed that everything I was trying wasn’t making her happy. I was trying different things for probably a good 3 hours and it was around 3am. I remember finally feeling completely defeated and just crying while rocking a crying baby. In times like this, you should ask for help. I wish I would have.
4.) You matter too.
You need to remember that you matter too, your health and your happiness matters. New moms seem to neglect themselves and put all their time and energy into their little’s… You need time for you to rest, rejuvenate and just to be happy. It takes a lot, and I mean A LOT to raise a human being, so you need to be the best YOU to be able to raise these little humans.
5.) You got this Mama!
Parenting is hard… being a Mom is even harder. You will have rough days where you feel the defeat taking over, you’ll feel so overwhelmed that all you feel like you can do is cry, you’ll feel like you are doing wrong and that you’re failing, but just remember something… your body made and carried this baby for 9 months. You made it through morning sickness and aches and pains that were so uncomfortable that you couldn’t sit some days. You handled contractions and labor for hours. You pushed a living thing the size of a cantaloupe out of a hole the size of a grape (Or had a C-section) … and you went through the postpartum healing… You went through all of this and survived, right? You got this parenting thing, Mama! Remember, this is new to you and there’s no other way of really learning how until you have a baby. Go easy on yourself. No Mom is perfect. This is how you learn.