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I swear that my 2 year old is trying to kill me. She will be the death of me due to lack of sleep. (I already don’t sleep well as it is.) My husband and I have not gotten decent sleep in about 2 months. My husband has been functioning off of coffee and I have been functioning off of sheer motivation because that’s all I have. I don’t drink coffee… yes, you heard that right, no coffee… or energy drinks. I have to go with the sheer motivation because I don’t want to get fired from my job for falling asleep and with what I do, that’s entirely possible. I’m attached to a computer 40 to 50 hours a week, so it gets boring.

When Averie was 4 months old, the only sleeping issue we had was the initial getting her to fall asleep. Once she fell asleep, 90% of the time, she slept through the night. Now, she fights us on going to bed and doesn’t stay asleep. She wakes up and then goes and wakes us up at least 3 times a night. Who’s idea was the big girl bed anyways?!

Fighting Bedtime.

It takes me, daddy and papa most nights to get her to stay in her bed and normally that’s about a 2 to 3 hour process. We just go a new baby gate that we put in front her door until she goes to sleep, then we move it. Even having the gate up, barricading her in her room, she still doesn’t give it up easily. She’ll call for her dad and I and we’ll just tell her to go to sleep without giving her the satisfaction of going to her room because that’s what she wants. So…. she has learned to call for Papa because he is weak and will go to her anytime she calls for him and she knows that.

Wanting Everything.

One of the main reasons why this is a 2 hour process is because she all of a sudden wants everything on God’s green earth when she said no to everything right before we put her in her bed.
Averie: Mama, ahhh juice?
Me: No juice, go to sleep.
Averie: MOMMY! AHHH Milk?!
Me: Nope, no milk either. You want a drink of water?
Averie: NO! I no wan waters!
Me: Okay, goodnight. *Walking away*
Averie: NO!!! AHHHH WATERS! (Her now asking for water.)
When I bring her a drink of water, she gets mad and throws a fit because it’s not juice…th

Her favorite thing to ask for is cheese for whatever reason. When asking for food and drinks doesn’t work, she’ll ask Papa to ‘Rock-a-baby’ which is him rocking her in the chair which he tries to do anytime she wants him to. Doesn’t work.

When she’s out of ideas.

When Averie realizes that we aren’t giving in and taking her out of her room, she’ll lie. Yes, my 2 year old lies. She’ll tell us, “I got poo-poo in nairs!” 90% of the time, she doesn’t…
As you can see, there’s a battle putting her to bed… It’s a battle pretty much every night. Sometimes we get lucky and she doesn’t fight us at all or sometimes she’ll even put herself to bed. SOMETIMES. That’s a rare occasion. Even though we get lucky sometimes putting her to bed, we almost never get lucky with her staying asleep. Can’t have everything, I guess.

Nightmares…?

Sometimes she’ll wake up crying around 2 or 3am and when I go in there, she has her hands on her eyes like she’s scared. When I ask if she’s scared, she’ll say yes, so I assume she had a nightmare. These suck and make me sad.

Sleepwalking.

One morning I was up at 4am to get ready to be to work by 5am, so it was still dark. I went to check on her and found that she was not in her bed. Naturally, I freaked out a little and woke Erich up. He jumped out of bed faster than I’ve ever seen him get out of bed. He looked in our room, our closets and our bathroom while I looked in her room, closet, and the other bathroom. (Normally she just goes to our room.) I walked down our long, creepy hallway to the living room and jumped when I found her sitting on the couch, asleep. SITTING UP, DEAD ASLEEP. She is so creepy.

Just Because.

The majority of the time, she just wakes up and then decides , “Since I’m awake, might as well go wake everyone else up.”
When she does come in our room, we’ll just lay her in bed with us and most of the time, she’ll go back to sleep and then so will we, but let me tell you, she’s a freaking bed hog and will eventually just wake up again to wake us up to tell us that she wants to go back to her bed…

Needless to say, I’m exhausted. All I’ve been thinking about lately, is sleep. Averie takes naps at daycare, so I’m screwed in that department. The only time I get to nap is if my husband or father-in-law are home to entertain her which is hardly never. Sometimes she’ll lay in bed with me and watch her tablet, but I swear, she doesn’t want me to sleep because the second my eyes close, she’s off the bed and is lathering herself in coco butter Vaseline…

Please tell me I am not alone in this no sleep club!

jessie