I think that every parent thinks when they have more than one child that they will grow up getting along and always share everything and just 100% get along. well… that doesn’t always happen! Don’t get me wrong, my kids all love each other. Even my two young ones… but they don’t always get along or are nice to each other…
I was one of those mom’s that thought that my kids were always going to get along, no matter what age. Boy was I wrong. Toddlers are mean to each other! LOL. For real, you wouldn’t think they have a mean bone in their bodies, but they do, just not mean intentions of course.
It started with my step daughter. She kept snatching toys out of her sisters hands or hiding her sisters toys from her because she wanted to play with them, or she expected sister to share her toys with her but my step daughter wouldn’t share in return. At first Averie didn’t care- she would just go pick up another toy and forget about it. Attention span of a goldfish like most young toddlers. Well, that didn’t last for very long. Averie started to cry and really get her feelings hurt. She would just sit there with her head down and cry so naturally, we had to talk to Lanaia about it… multiple times.
She then started putting all the bath toys behind her when they would take a bath so Averie couldn’t play with them. So again we had more talks with her on how it’s not nice to hide toys from her sister or not share with her sister. When that didn’t work, she got toys taken from her and would have to sit in timeout for treating her sister poorly.
My husband and I always said to each other, ‘I hope Lanaia stops doing this soon, because Averie is feisty and will eventually catch on and do the same thing and Lanaia is so sensitive so she would take it worse than Averie does.’ Well… that day came. Averie doesn’t allow her to take toys from her anymore or hide them… in fact, not only is she protective over her toys now, she has become mean… My two year old is in the hitting phase… At least I hope this is a phase.
She straight slaps Lanaia in the face now. Just a few weeks ago, my sweet 2 year old took her shoe off, walked over to her sister who was just laying there, and smacks her upside the head with her shoe! We had to separate them at the table because Averie doesn’t like the way that her older sister chews…? So she smacks her.
When my husband and I talked about Averie eventually standing up for her self, we did not think it would be like this. Lol. Not even close. I don’t mean to laugh, because it isn’t funny that she hits, not at all, but it all just escalated so quickly, that we are lost on how to get her to stop.
How the hell do you get a 2 year old to stop hitting and make her understand that it isn’t nice when she IS 2 and doesn’t understand?! How the hell do you explain to a 4 year old that her little sister doesn’t hate her and doesn’t mean any hate when she smacks her when she IS 4 and is getting smacked and also doesn’t understand?!
We talk to Averie and tell her that she made her sister sad and that she needs to apologize. Averie usually apologizes and gives her a hug and tells her she loves her but, again, she’s 2 and doesn’t fully understand that she isn’t suppose to do it again. *Facepalm*
Since Lanaia knows that Averie get’s in trouble when she hits her, she takes that and runs with it.
Since all of this started, I stand outside the door of their room and watch them play without them seeing me. I’ve noticed that Lanaia will come to either her dad or I and lie about Averie hitting her to get her in trouble or to get attention. Really…
I will also go in there at night after we put them to bed and usually Lanaia is just sitting in her bed and Averie is the out of her bed and in Lanaia’s bed, behind her, brushing her hair… Lanaia sits there with a puzzled look on her face. I ask her, “Why is Averie brushing your hair?” She says, “Because she wanted to…” As she says this, she looks upset, so I ask her, “Why are you letting her brush your hair?” And she says, “Because she told me to…” Great, now my 2 year old is a bully. Lol.
Lord help me with these 2.