Toddler tantrums are fun, right? Especially when they decided that PUBLIC is the best place to have one. I have a few tips for you all on how to handle said tantrums.

Tantrums at home:

  • Hide. Just take some wine and hide in a closet.
  • Give them sleepy nighttime cough medicine. Hello Naptime.
  • Turn the music up really loud. If you can’t hear them screaming, there’s no problem.
  • Stick them in a closet.

Tantrums at the grocery store:

  • Leave them in the toy isle and continue shopping.
  • Take a friend shopping with you and then leave her with your toddler.
  • Or, you can leave them with the cashier and claim you have forgotten something and you’ll be back real quick and then walk to the complete back of the store.

Tantrums at church:

  • Claim they are possessed.
  • Just tell yourself and everyone who is judgmentally staring at you that your toddler is just so excited about God.
  • Get buzzed before church so you won’t really care too much if they do throw a tantrum.
  • Hand them to anyone there. No one is going to say no when they are in church.

If all of these fails, just throw a tantrum right along with your toddler. People are already staring at you guys anyways-why not give them something to really stare at?

*Sarcasm intended*